Fat Jokes

Yo mamma is so fat she was diagnosed with flesh eating bacteria and the doctor gave her 87 years to live.

Your mum’s so fat she doesn’t need the internet; she’s already world wide.

Kelly is so fat, he shows up on radar.

Seriously though, Judy isn’t fat, she insists she’s just 4 feet too short.

Yo mama is so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.

Yo mama is so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!

Yo mama is so fat we went to the drive-in and didn’t have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.

Two fat girls were walking, when the bus came. One says to another : “ Is it my turn to ride on a bus today? “

You’re so fat, Goodyear wanted to fly you over the Superbowl.

Yo mama’s so fat, she was attacked by Japanese military, they thought she was Godzilla’s wife.

Yo mamma is so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.

Yo mamma is so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of George Washington’s nose.

Yo mama is so fat she’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book.

Yo mama is so fat, she got arrested at the airport for ten pounds of crack.

Yo mama is so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

Yo momma’s so fat her cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard.

Yo mama’s so fat, on Halloween she says “Trick or Meatloaf!”

Yo mama’s so fat, I had to take a train and two buses just to get to her GOOD side.

Also, there was the time Paulette fell over in the sand and rocked herself to sleep trying to get up. She was eventually awakened by a lifeguard who asked her to move back because the tide was waiting to come in.

The rather broad lady showed up at the theatre just before theperformance started and handed the usher two tickets. “Where’sthe other party?” asked the usher.”Well,” said the lady, with a blush, “you see one seatis a little small for me and rather uncomfortable so I boughttwo. But they’re both really for me.””Okay with me, lady,” the usher replied, scratchinghis head. “There’s just one problem. Your seats are numbersfifty-one and sixty-three.”

Your Mama’s so fat she once went on a seafood diet…whenever she saw food she ate it!

Your Mama’s so fat that folk exercise by jogging around her!

Your Mama’s so fat when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.

Your Mama’s so fat she makes Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie.

Your Mama’s so fat NASA plans to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer.

Your Mama’s so fat she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm.

Your Mama’s so fat small objects orbit her.

Your mama’s so fat she makes olympic sumo wrestlers look anorexic.

The guy is so fat, he leaves footprints in concrete!

Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale it said, “To be continued.”

One guy was so fat, he had his own area code.

You are so fat NASA orbits satellites around you.

Kelly is so big, he plays hopscotch like, “Texas…Alabama…North Carolina…Pennsylvania…”

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