… if it goes too easy something is wrong

Dear gentle blog reader,

Hope you like this hilarious article (Canines for a feline free tomorrow?):

If American politicians are going to quarrel like cats and dogs, why not just elect cats and dogs?

They may scratch furniture and make an occasional mess on the floor, but look at the messes some elected officials leave.

Almost every election cycle, you see a story in which someone, somewhere, thinks it’s pointed or funny to run a pet for mayor or sheriff. The person print up some buttons and has a few laughs. But the candidacy of Hank the Cat may reach a new level.

Hank is a 9-year-old Maine coon who resides in Springfield, Va., with his campaign and media managers — “owners” seems a little sterile — Matthew O’ Leary and Anthony Roberts.

Last October, they declared Hank a candidate for the Senate seat in Virginia being vacated by Sen. Jim Webb. Mr. O’ Leary says they wanted to “kind of let off some steam” about the “negative and vitriolic” nature of politics and opened a Facebook page to promote their feline favorite son.

And of course, they produced a video that began, “America is the greatest land of all. A land where all people can live free,” showing the Statue of Liberty at sunrise, moon-lit cityscapes, school kids, cowboys and other emblematic Americans of all hues in classrooms, farms and factories. It is indistinguishable from many other political ads until the end, when you hear: “Vote Hank for U.S. Senate.”

And you realize: That’s a cat.

Here’s the rest of the story:
Hank for Senate

… what half of society thinks I do, what the other half of society thinks I do, what funding institutions think I do, what I think I do, what I really do

… what Rick Santorum thinks I am, what I think I am, what I really am!

They beeped out every word he said.
cr: George Takei

“It was only 8 minutes” because they “edited out all scenes of women driving …”

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with ‘Guess’ on it.
So I said ‘Implants?’
She hit me.

Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.

How come they choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go ‘skinny dipping,’ now I just ‘chunky dunk.’

Don’t argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Why is it that our children can’t read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

Wouldn’t you know it….
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

And remember:
Life is like a roll of toilet paper.
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

Have a great day and enjoy!