Lawyer Jokes II
- Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
From chasing parked ambulances.
- What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 50?
- What do you call a lawyer whose gone bad?
- What’s the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?
You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline!
- How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
His lips are moving.
- What’s the difference between a dead dog and a dead lawyer in the road?
There are skid marks in front of the dog.
- How many lawyers does it take to roof a house?
Depends on how thin you slice them.
- What do lawyers do when they die ?
- Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?
- What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
Not enough sand.
- What is the definition of a shame (as in ‘that’s a shame’ )?
When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
- What is the definition of a ‘crying shame’ ?
There was an empty seat.
- How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?
- Have you heard about the lawyers word processor?
No matter what font you select, everything come out in fine print.
- What do you buy a friend graduating from Law School?
- What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
The lawyer charges more.
- What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A vampire only sucks blood at night.
- What is brown and black and looks good on a lawyer?
- How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
- Why did the post office recall the new lawyer stamps?
Because people could not tell which side to spit on.
- What do Lawyers do when they die ?