Mommy Mommy Jokes II

 

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don’t like Sis!
mom: Shut up, and keep eating!

son: Mommy, Mommy! I hate daddy’s guts.
mom: Well, just leave them on the side of the plate.

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don’t like the crunchy stuff in my pea soup!
mom: Shut up. Do you think I pour Grandpa’s vomit through a slieve?

son: Mommy, Mommy! I wanted to lick the bowl this time.
mom: Shaddup and flush.

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don’t like this spaghetti!
mom: Shutup or I’ll rip the veins outta yer other arm!!!

son: Mommy, Mommy! I HATE red and green spagetti!
mom: Shut up or I’ll pull the veins out of your other arm.

son: Mummy, Mummy! what’s for dinner?
mom: Shut up and get back in the oven.

son: Mommy, mommy! I don’t want any more hamburger!
mom: Shut up and stick your arms back into the meat grinder.

son: Mommy, mommy! Daddy threw up all over the kitchen floor.
mom: Just ignore him, son.
son: But little sis is getting all of the BIG pieces!

UglyWomanAlone.jpg Ugly Woman image by aguynmemphis

son: Mommy, Mommy! are you sure this is the right way to cook Beijing Duck?
mom: Shuddup and close the microwave oven door behind you!

son: Mommy, Mommy! When will we have this nice yellow pudding again?
mom: Shut up, you know that grandma’s leg is no longer infested.

son: Mommy, Mommy! are we really vampires?
mom: Shut up and drink your soup before it clots!

son: Mommy Mommy! I’m not hungry anymore.
mom: Shut up and finish your paint chips.

son: Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy running so fast?
mom: Shut up, and shoot!

son: Mommy, mommy, why is everyone running away?
mom: Shut up and reload.

son: Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy running away?
mom: Shut up, and help me reload the shotgun!

son: Mommy, mommy, I don’t wanna visit Grandma!
mom: Shut up and keep digging.

son: Mommy, Mommy! Joey is biting grandma’s nail.
mom: Joey, stop it, or I am closing the coffin!

son: Mommy, Mommy! I want to play with Sheldon!
mom: Shut up and close the coffin!

son: Mommy, Mommy! How will we ever find Daddy on this golf course?
mom: Shut up and search the sand traps!

son: Mommy, Mommy! Can I play in the sandbox?
mom: Not until I find a better place to bury Daddy.

son: Mommy, Mommy! Can I play with grandma?
mom: Not today, we already dug her three times this week.

son: Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy so pale?
mom: Shut up and keep digging.

son: Mommy, Mommy, I don’t want to see daddy again.
mom: Shut up and keep digging.

son: Mommy, Mommy, I want to play with Grandpa now!
mom: Keep quiet, the coffin stays closed today!

son: Mommy, Mommy! Can’t we give Daddy a decent burial?
mom: Shut up and keep flushing!

son: Mommy, mommy! I don’t want to go to China.
mom: Shut up and keep digging

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don’t want to see Niagara falls!
mom: Shut up and get back in the barrel!

son: Mommy, Mommy! I’m sick of learning how to swim!
mom: Shut up or I’ll flush it again!

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